You guys lied to me.

Not that any of you are consistent readers, but I am getting views, so there's that.  But you're not really coming from anywhere specific. Lots of dating sites, a couple of blogging sites...

Well look at that. Most of these readers are from the U.S. Imagine that.  Second country on that list? RUSSIA. Good job Russia, you guys make me feel loved.

Y'all want a story? Here's a story.

This is how I got bitten by a dog while delivering a pizza.

Remember how I said I needed a job for the summer to get my parents off my back? I did it. I succeeded. I landed a job as a delivery driver for BNPC (Big Name Pizza Company; I ain't telling you guys where).  Anywho, this lady placed an order for 2 pizzas. I was not a part of the order placing process.  The pizzas were made. I was not part of that process either.  The pizzas were prepped and put in boxes. I was not a part of that either.  I hen returned from a different delivery, and was told to go deliver it, as that is what I am being payed to do.  So I grab the pizzas, put the address in my GPS, and was on my way.  I get there, and I approach the front door.  As I'm on my way there, I here a lady call from the carport "No! Hey! HEY! GET BACK HERE!"  I for some bizarre reason assume she means me, so I head around the bush towards the garage, where I am met by a dog.  Not a huge dog, not a small dog, but probably about 60 pounds.  He apparently wanted pizza. He was trying to tell me in the nicest tone he could achieve to put down the boxes and walk away.  When I misinterpreted his suggestion as a plea for attention, he became more desperate.  He nipped at my hand, so I backed off a little.

That was a bad decision.

I should mention, the owner wasn't just letting it happen and watching the situation, she was actively trying to pull the dog back inside, but he was too strong for her.

Anyway, when I took a few steps back, he lunged forward and bit at my ankle.  my fight or flight reaction kicked in, and while I was deciding, the owner, terrified for my safety, yelled "RUN!"

This was another bad decision.

I am by no means a skinny and or fit person.  I cannot outrun a dog of that caliber.  It followed me, no longer simply nipping at me, now in full-on attack mode.  I started picking up my legs, extending my stride so I was harder to get, but to no avail. I made it off the property, as was apparently the owners plan, since the yard had an invisible fence.  I was bitten in two areas-my upper thigh on the inside of my right leg, and my outer ankle on the left leg.

She payed for the food, tipped like $5, and we parted ways.  My mother decided I should probably get to the hospital to make sure the wounds don't get infected, and now BNPC is covering my bills, while my neighbor, who happens to be a lawyer, wants to help me pay for college by suing the owner's insurance company.

Frankly? I'm not mad about the whole ordeal. The dog tried to tell me it wanted the pizza, warned me to get off its property, then took action when I didn't do as he said.